Sparking Joy...for less stress and more positive energy

Have you ever stood in front of your closet and thought, “I have nothing to wear?” You are in good company if you answered yes. I have a theory about why this is so prevalent. And, I must thank Marie Kondo and Chriselle Lim for this epiphany and argument in favor of asking, “Does this spark joy?" Adding to that question, “If not, why not?”

Less-Stress Organizing Solutions Blog Spark Joy

This morning I was re-reading an article in Darling Magazine-Issue 7 written by Chriselle Lim. Her article, “Paper Doll” inspired a circuitous thought bubble as I contemplated my own challenges with curating my closet and outfits over the years. Chriselle notes a few key guidelines in her article. Her second key point, “Focus on your favorite object,” was meant to inspire the reader to begin building an outfit with a favorite item.

My ADHD brain went into overdrive considering the connection between the pitfalls of retail therapy and curating a closet of clothing we love to wear.

One possible reason many garments, shoes, and accessories don’t spark joy for some of us, is connected to our reason for making those purchases in the first place. Think about it. If you initially purchase something to soothe or validate yourself, is it possible you hesitate later to continue using that item, unknowingly, because it triggers negative feelings?!

I know this to be true for myself. I used to LOVE shopping! But my closet was filled with many garments that were just a little bit snug because I would only purchase clothes when I felt good about my body. Those clothes mocked me every time I saw them. And, I would no longer feel good about myself. I felt like I had almost nothing to wear in a sea of beautiful garments. Retail therapy as a reward system has its drawbacks, as I learned. At the end of the day, I still need clothing that feels comfortable, fits well, and suits the body I have right now.

Purchasing something when I feel angry or sad is almost always regretted. Admittedly, retail therapy, feels good, but only in the moment. Later, I am reminded of the negative event and usually return my purchase unworn. If it cannot be returned or a small part of me really does like this item or finds it useful, I spend time reframing reasons for keeping it so that it brings me joy going forward. If I cannot find a positive spin, I give it away and consider this episode of retail therapy another difficult lesson learned.

If we are making purchases without considering the financial implications, even when we love something at the time of the purchase, it may become a negative reminder of an impulse that added to our financial woes. And, that is a good enough reason to reconsider the purchase and reinforces my theory that retail therapy doesn’t always bring the lasting joy we seek.

In my twenties, I LOVED earrings. Since, I wore scrubs to work every day, earrings were the only accessory I could wear that brought a little whimsy or personality to my outfitting. I treated myself to a new pair every month or so and enjoyed wearing each and every pair! My choices were mindful and deliberate, and their cost fit my budget. There was no negativity attached to them.

I don’t wear earrings as often any more. My style and taste have changed. So, letting go of most of my earring collection was really quite easy. It served me well for a long time and is now making someone else happy.

Perhaps, Marie Kondo really IS on to something when it comes to curating the contents of our homes from a place of joy. If we make mindful choices, choices that are needed, wanted, and/or bring us joy, then seeing and using what we bring and keep in our spaces will be more likely to foster less stress and more joyful living. And, that includes a curated closet that lifts us up.

I say, Amen to that!

Let Go...expect it to add value.

Today is New Year’s Day, at least for a few more hours. If you are an introvert, then you will relate to this. I didn’t want to go anywhere, make small talk, eat one more less than healthy meal or someone else’s idea of delicious. And, just for this one day, I didn’t want to meet anyone’s expectations after the demands and challenges of the past few months.

There. I said it. Selfish maybe, but, why not make this the year of self-care?! If we don’t take care of ourselves, there isn’t much of us left for others. So! I stayed home for most of the day and felt like the cat that got the cream. Don’t worry, I DID walk my dog. There are some expectations I am happy to hold.

As I review 2018, I can see many of the expectations I have grown to resent are of my own making. This year I am determined to let them go and create the life that fulfills me and brings joy and contentment to myself and those most important in my life. If this appeals to you, then please join me in the quest for finding more joy and less stress.

One of the most interesting, and, most likely, important gifts I received this year is a planner because it stimulated a long train of thought in a brain where everything is connected.  So, what does that have to do with letting go, you might ask?! I am a fan of Planner Pads as some of you know and faithfully use them. But I am now, as of today, exploring The Desire Map Planner, by Danielle LaPorte. (Thank you, Shelley!)

Parker knows exactly how he wants to feel. Rested!

Parker knows exactly how he wants to feel. Rested!

In order to maximize this tool fully, I downloaded three workbooks from her website and have been pouring out my heart and soul onto paper. As I answered her questions about expectations and letting go, I felt compelled to stop and share a few thoughts with you. So here I sit, amidst my notes and pens, and my thoughts.

I’m not going to give you complicated guidelines or lists to follow. Instead, I will paraphrase thoughts my review of the first workbook set in motion. Consider beginning with these questions: How do you want your life to feel? How do you want your work to feel? How do you want your body to feel? You get the idea.

What if you let go of what doesn’t bring you closer to how you want to feel and start there? How would this impact your daily life in the immediate moment and over time? I expect to discover my own answer to this over the next year. I will most likely share my progress in a few months. There is a bit of a learning curve and I want to dive in a bit more before I make any bold statements.

For now, simply ask yourself as you go through your day, “Does this thing, this task, this event, this meal bring me closer to the life I want and the feelings I desire?” Letting go of a long, long, LONG laundry list of to-do’s for 2019 might just be what you need. It’s where I’m starting this year, for less stress and a lot more joy.

Happy New Year, my friends!


For more information regarding Danielle LaPorte’s Desire Map Planner, check her website.

Full disclosure: I gain nothing from referring you to her work other than the satisfaction of sharing something that may add value to your life. I would love to hear if you have used her planner previously and what impact it had on your life.

A special thank you to Jess G. for your invaluable insights.

Productivity...Finishing something is a very good place to start!

"I don't know where to start and I feel like I'm falling more and more behind!" These are words I hear frequently from prospective clients. I know the accompanying, unsettling feelings well. 

It's true confessions time! If you follow my blog, you know I haven't posted a new blog piece since February. If this isn't delayed decision making and fear of making a wrong move, I don't know what is. I am now a published author. So on the surface, one might think I have it all figured out. The truth is, authors struggle with the same things everyone else does every time we sit down to write. What better subject to tackle than delayed decision making?!

Today, I am choosing to follow my own sage advice. Choose something and FINISH IT!! 

When I don't know where to begin, I find something, one thing, any thing, and finish it. This may seem to contradict much of what you have been taught, and even some of what I have written in previous posts. It is not meant to replace other excellent advice. This is simply another strategy for getting unstuck and moving forward.

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Prioritization, planning, and scheduling are still important productivity tools. But, sometimes, there is so much begging our attention, we delay making any decision for fear of making the wrong decision. I am here to tell you, doing nothing is a decision.

What remains are unfinished tasks and what I have come to think of as loose threads both physically and mentally. Delayed decisions seem to multiply exponentially and add to our stress levels making planning and productivity even more challenging. 

In those moments when we have allowed delayed decision making and perfectionism to paralyze us, setting aside our fear of making the wrong decision is critical. But, getting into any sort of momentum requires taking a first step.

So I ask you this: What if you were to choose one simple task to finish? And, then you were to finish it. Just one task. It need not be the most important, but rather, just one task you are absolutely certain of completing. It could be as simple as clearing the kitchen counter or folding a load of laundry, or five minutes sorting the afternoon mail, or clearing your desk before writing an important email. But, in those next moments, you have completed a task and prepared yourself mentally for another task.

You have finished something. 

The next step is to repeat that simple first step until you feel a sense of calm and confidence. I promise calm and self-confidence are there if you will allow yourself to appreciate and value completion of even the smallest of tasks. 

Once you feel the momentum build, you are more prepared to prioritize and strategize asking these important questions: What is the best use of my time? What is critical or time sensitive? What adds the most value to my life and goals? And, then, finish something that answers those questions. Today I have done exactly that! I finished simple tasks at home and then headed to have my car serviced. I put myself into momentum and now here I sit blogging for the first time in months.

It feels good to finish something! Try just might like it!!

Resolutions...a very good place to start

In the spirit of Chinese New Year and The Year of the Dog, I thought I would share my alphabet soup of practical organizing and productivity words to help build your lists. It's not too late to start visualizing and manifesting your goals for the next twelve months. 

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RE Assess Begin where you are. Take a look at what is and isn't working for you. Know what you want to feel in your home and work spaces. Real change begins with having a vision, and, remembering that vision.

RE Boot Check your computer and phone. Update settings and make sure that they suit you. Are your emails out of control? No time like the present to unsubscribe and delete, delete, delete!

RE Cycle Do you have a designated space for recyclable materials? Make it easy on yourself to follow through with this goal by taking a little time to set up a space in your kitchen, office, garage, or the side of your home to collect the items that can be repurposed. 

RE Define  Know the difference between a project and a task. Break down your goals into manageable pieces. Celebrate the completion of each task with a little mental "high five" rather than wait until the entire project is finished to acknowledge your accomplishment. 

RE Finance February is a good time to reevaluate your budget and commit to following it. Tax time is here. Gather what you need to complete your returns.

RE Enerergize Repainting your walls is a simple and inexpensive way to change how a room feels. Consider colors that enhance the feeling you want in each room and have fun with it. 

RE Group No budget for new furniture or decorations for spring? Edit your spaces by removing what you no longer need. Try rearranging what remains to make the room look fresh. Regroup favorite photos as a collage on the wall or group books by their jacket colors to add a focal point on a shelf.

RE Hash Do your files need revision? Do you have three files with similar names making it difficult to remember which one houses what you seek? Make a decision to simplify your labeling. While you're at it, purge old, irrelevant files, and shred anything with personal information.

RE Inforce New habits and resolutions need reminders. Reinforce your commitment by writing things down in your planners and calendars. Add visual reminders until what's new becomes habit. Use them and keep them easily accessible.

RE Juvenate Commit to self-care! Schedule regular time to restore your energy, to decompress, and, to find your calm center in ways that fit you. For me it's a manicure or a few hours at the beach. 

RE Kindle Is there a hobby or skill you want to pursue? Make time for something that makes your heart happy and to remember your creative self. Take photos, write in your journal, fit a puzzle, binge watch old classic black and white movies. Do YOU!  

RE Linquish Let go of what you no longer need, use, or love! Let having less to clean and take care of, lighten your load; and, at the same time help someone in need.

RE Move This is a good time of year to remove toxic items stored in your garage. Check your local waste removal companies to learn where to take old batteries, old paint and stains, and electronic waste. 

RE Number If you can finish something in two minutes or less, why wait?  For me, it takes longer to add some things to my list than it does to actually complete them. In the spirit of getting things done: keep it simple, know your priorities, and keep your main task list short. 

RE Organize Be sure to edit your belongings before organizing them. Purchase any containers, shelving, or organizing systems after you decide what to keep. It saves time and money in the long run.

RE Pair Are you having trouble finding a replacement for your favorite shoes or boots? Consider having the soles repaired by a cobbler. They'll be good as new for a fraction of the replacement cost.

RE Quest There are only 24 hours in a day. Be sure to utilize resources that are available, request help when necessary, and delegate tasks. Whether at home or work, many hands make small work!

RE aRange Keep items you reach for the most often where you can easily access them. This may require you to remove and rearrange the contents of your cabinets, shelves and closets. 

RE Sale Do you have a growing collection of gently used clothing? Take them to local consignment shop. Be sure to repair and launder items before reselling or donating.

RE Turn To quote Peter Walsh, "Don't put it down, put it away!" Return things after using them. You will save time over the long run and will thank yourself later when you can find it in its designated place.

RE Use I'm a big fan of reusing and repurposing common household belongings in new ways.  My favorite multipurpose rock star item is the mason jar. There are a million uses for them, they come in several sizes, and are inexpensive. 

RE View Don't let perfectionism hinder your path to what you want to accomplish. There are very few jobs that require perfection. Why not take a new view of your progress and let good enough be good enough?!

RE Wire Have you considered feng shui or space healing to bring clarity and energy to your home or office? I have recently explored these options in ma petit chateau and have found setting intentions, writing affirmations, and deliberately arranging my environment to have positive benefits. 

RE eXamine Schedule annual appointments including vision and dental screenings. Remove old, expired first aid and medications in your bathrooms and cabinets and replace what you still need and use on a regular basis.  

RE Ykjavik Iceland anyone?! It's not too early to put travel plans for summer vacation into motion. Begin with your destination, lodging, and transportation arrangements. 

RE ZZZ! Finally, I cannot stress enough the importance of adequate, restorative sleep. It sets the tone for your whole day, at least that has been my experience. A calm, uncluttered bedroom with no signs of work when you awaken is a good place to begin. Know your caffeine limitations. Has your promise to yourself to limit caffeine wavered? Add that to your resolutions. Finally, take a look at your bedtime routine. Does it need tweaking so that you feel relaxed enough to fall into a deep sleep?  

Happy New Year! May it be filled with less stress and more joy!


Work Life's more than a balancing act

"It's the most wonderful time of the year!" Or so the song goes.

How often do we hear people say, "My life is crazy busy right now?!" To me, it's a badge of honor that comes with a price. What if we focus upon giving ourselves permission to let some things go, and commit instead to nurture harmony within our hearts and within our lives? Could this shift in thinking pave the way to a more peaceful sense of calm amidst the hustle and bustle of the holidays? I say, "Yes!"

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This season, I've decided to lessen my grip on balance and redirect my energies toward harmony.

What do I mean by this?!  Do you remember the movie, "One Fine Day?" It is a story of a single mom (Michelle Pfeffier) in New York City who has trouble letting anyone help her. There is a scene where the protagonist (George Clooney) offers assistance which she flatly refuses saying, "I've got all these little balls up in the air and if someone catches one of them for me I will probably drop them all." 

I can certainly relate to her statement. The thought of a milion balls crashing around me is overwhelming. Yet, if I don't delegate, prioritize, and share the load, they will fall despite my best efforts. There are not enough hours in the day, as Michelle's character also learned.

By definition, balance is a point between two opposing forces. Balls up, must come down, and this juggling takes constant effort. Harmony, on the other hand, takes a slight detour on a gentler path. Finding a pleasing arrangement of parts, or harmony, requires attention to the details, a vision for the bigger picture, and a willingness to edit. Ask anyone who has been a part of a vocal group. 

Moving past balance to the place of harmony allows us to be completely present and immersed in whatever we are doing whether it is a work project, a meeting, watching a movie, or ice skating by the sea. All deserve our full and undivided attention. 

Just as you declutter and purge stuff you no longer use or need, your schedules and task lists require the same refresh. This is a good time of year to make space in your days to savor and slow down, to be selective when saying yes to social gatherings and festivities, and to leave time for the unexpected. 

Here's what I will keep on my list: self-care and daily activities that provide stress reduction and health benefits, connection to the people I cherish, conversations with stake holders before making decisions, current work commitments, and, a few weekend days for merriment for its own sake. I already feel better with this plan.

This weekend began a little rough. I was fighting a virus. Yet, it turned out to be the perfect time to put my "holiday harmony" plan into action. I worked from home, rested and took a few breaks; and, when I felt a little burst of energy, I made space for a few of my favorite holiday traditions, lights and decorating the Christmas trees. 

A few little trees near my kitchen.

A few little trees near my kitchen.

I expect to find that my quest for harmony will lead to more joy and less stress this year. It is my wish for you as well.

Happiest holidays!

Motivation and productivity...what I Could do is my choice

There are a million strategies and articles written to help motivate us and guide us toward becoming more productive. I'm not going to add heavily to that list today. Instead, I’m going to give you something simple to consider.

I read an article in Darling Magazine recently that reminded me of something I learned more than thirty years ago from a wise mentor. I'm going to share her sage advice with you now. It is a simple shift in thinking.

She told me to stop "should-ing on myself" and to "substitute the word could in place of the word should." It was that simple. This little shift in my mindset is a powerful tool when I feel the weight of external pressures and when my to do list feels unmanageable.

There are many things that we do in our day to day lives, and many demands upon our attention. Some them are not all that much fun. Need I say, paying bills, laundry, and staff meetings are not high on most lists of "I can't wait to do this?"; and yet, they serve a purpose we appreciate.

When we sit down with colleagues to discuss what is important to the group, we are choosing to keep communication lines open and choosing to give people the opportunity to be heard. When we see home caring tasks as ways to nurture our families rather than tasks that we should and must do, the tasks feel different. And, we feel different doing them.

Last week, I had a growing mountain of tasks on my list, along with appointments and scheduled work projects, and felt overwhelmed by the big picture. I heard this rumble of a nagging voice in the recesses of my mind telling me I should do this and should have already finished that!

How did I quiet that voice? I substituted should with could.

I wrote a list of every task that I thought I could do at the top of my planner page. Seeing it in black and white and resetting my mindset was a mental refresh for me. 

For the rest of the week, I looked at unscheduled blocks of time and asked myself, “What could I be doing with this time?” I considered the consequences of procrastinating a particularly tedious but time-sensitive task and opted to do it first thing that morning and felt instantly successful. I also, gave myself permission to take breaks as my energy waned. I savored the lulls rather than allow guilt to steal my joy.

Gandalf chooses to pace his busy day of grooming, eating, and sleeping by stopping to smell the roses. 

Gandalf chooses to pace his busy day of grooming, eating, and sleeping by stopping to smell the roses. 

Slowly but surely tasks on my could list disappeared along with a few other tasks that I added later, just because I could. Imagine that! 

When we say could, we take ownership for our actions and feel empowered. What we could do with our time may be exactly the same as what think we should be doing with our time. But the pressure is lifted. Should sucks the joy out of life. Could gives us back our joy and allows us to set our own course! I like that.





Small Homes...making the most of small spaces is largely about knowing your priorities and being creative

I have always considered myself to be an efficient packer and unpacker, a master setter-upper of sorts. After moving several times as a military spouse, I learned how to quickly settle into whatever new space was deemed home. I had it down to a science. Given six weeks, I had everything unpacked, sorted, and cozy. Everything quickly in its place and where I would use it.

I have been fortunate to have enough space for what I need, use, and love. And, I enjoy finding creative ways to use ordinary things.

Recently, I moved into what has become affectionately know as ma petite chateau. I moved more than ten weeks ago into my little castle and am still making decisions about furniture placement and what will ultimately stay in residence. I have slowed down the process and am savoring the choices that I am making. No rush this time to finish in under six weeks. 

This petite home has all of the elements that are important to me, but in smaller proportions than I have had in the past. Making this work has given me the opportunity to stretch myself creatively. Smaller requires resourcefulness and out-of-the-box thinking as I repurpose my favorite things. Smaller has demanded honesty about what is most important to me, and courage to let go of the stuff that does not fit my life here. 

I am making space for new memories as I shed the excess that is no longer relevant. I kept a few large pieces of furniture that make me happy and have found that they are just right as long as I keep accessories and decorative items to a minimum. But the reduction in square footage from my last home necessitated saying farewell to the treasured antiques and heavy furniture that I have collected in my travels. They no longer fit.

Knowing my priorities has been pivotol in personalizing ma petite chateau

My priorities are space for solitude and rejuvenation, space for a little garden, space for books and reading, space for my desk and creative projects, space to linger over coffee and food with friends and family, and a pretty view from my kitchen sink. These are my simple pleasures. 

I am fortunate to have found just what I needed nestled among pretty trees and profuse honeysuckle vines in a city that I love. And, best of all, the beach is a fifteen minute drive away. Could it be that down sizing has given me room to breathe! I say, "Yes!"

That said, I am still making make tough choices about what to keep and what to discard. So, when I worry about not having enough space, I revisit my priorities. Too much in a small space feels overwhelming. I choose calm and the tranquility that it brings to my life.

This morning, I took a few minutes to do a little gardening...watering, deadheading, and a quick sweep of the dust from recent Santa Ana winds.  Although I miss my beautiful rose garden, I cannot help but enjoy the time that smaller has opened up for me. Waffles and coffee while I write, all the while knowing I have time for a few hours in Solana Beach when my work is done. Heaven!

While my garage is a holding space for the undecided items and the projects in process, there is still room to park my car in it. Most of my packed boxes have been sorted and put away; the sturdiest have been broken down for the next organizing project with clients. But, until a week or so ago, there remained several unopened boxes of books.

I was patiently awaiting the arrival of a bookcase to house my library, in the space I had designated as my "reading nook." I had ordered a bookcase that would fit perfectly in a corner of my bedroom. 

Keep pathways clear and open while unpacking. Better to have boxes than precipitous piles while you decide furniture placement. Yes, that is a sheet taped to the window until I choose window treatments because privacy is a priority.

Keep pathways clear and open while unpacking. Better to have boxes than precipitous piles while you decide furniture placement. Yes, that is a sheet taped to the window until I choose window treatments because privacy is a priority.

As luck would have it, when the bookcase arrived, the delivery men refused to carry it up the stairs. They said it was too big. I had forgotten to allow for the tight turn at the bottom of the stairs. There was no doubt in my mind that the bookcase was staying. I just had to find wall space for it without unbalancing the entire room.

It looks beautiful near my kitchen and petite living room; and, I see it every time I stand at my kitchen sink.  Now I have a view of the trees out the window and my books. Have I mentioned that books make me happy?!

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The little nook that is my living room has a cozy rug, a sofa, a television and a place to rest a few coffee cups or dishes while relaxing. It is truly the passageway to go upstairs. But, a large mirror hangs on one wall reflecting light and giving the illusion of more space than actually exists. And books are close at hand. 

Today marks ten weeks and one day since I received the keys to ma petite chateau. And, everyday I find something to appreciate about smaller home living. I have everything I need.


Moving...a change could be just what you need

Today, as I sit on my patio with my iced coffee listening to the birds, and the cars rushing past ma petite chateau, I am grateful. Grateful that I have all the packing and schlepping behind me, grateful for the end of the myriad of paperwork and intrusion into my personal life, and grateful for the opportunity to begin again in my own little corner of the planet.

Getting here was not easy and not for the faint of heart. But, it was just what I needed.

Have you considered relocating? Downsizing? Upsizing? Right sizing? Do you need to change your living arrangements due to a "change of circumstance?" 

In February, I answered yes to right sizing and making the final move toward my independence. "Let's put the house on the market in June," I said. "Okay," he said.

You may have noticed that today is May 21. My taking it slow and easy plan looked great on paper, but ended up moving at warp speed!

I found a realtor who was aligned with my need to look first before listing the house.  I wanted to be excited about this move. I was leaving the home where I had nurtured and raised my family, and where I had spent years developing a beautiful garden and bird sanctuary. I was leaving this all behind. I could take the memories with me, but not the visual peace of it all. And, this was a final goodbye to my married life.

Off I went to find a little place that I could afford near the new life I have built, where I could find peace, inspiration, and restoration. I found it sooner than expected and then sold the family home just as quickly. Blessings both, I know, along with the lessons learned through all of this.

Here's my checklist of do's and don'ts refined after recently practicing what I teach my clients.

1. Know what you can afford and stick to it. Prequalify for your home loan. Take a hard look at your expenses and budget for rent or for a mortgage.

2. Know what is most important to you. Can you give up an office space for a pretty patio garden?  Bigger kitchen for a smaller than optimal living room? I found, "Loving The House You're In," by Paige Rein, to be insightful and helpful as I navigated my transition to a smaller home.

3. Interview more than one realtor and loan officer/broker and find a good fit for you. They will see the good, the bad, and the ugly sides of your temperament. They will also help to put the bumps and bruises of buying and selling into perspective.

4. Trust your gut. 

5. Start decluttering long before you list your home. In fact, start now even if you aren't  thinking about moving. Get rid of anything and everything that is weighing you down. If you don't use it, need it, or love it, let it go!

                                                        Recycle, repurpose, and share.

                                                        Recycle, repurpose, and share.

6. Not sure what you will need at the other end? Believe me when I say that I appreciate this. There comes a point in  the moving process when you feel exhausted from the endless decision making. What remains will be boxed up and taken to your next home. The down side is that you will need to pick up where you left off at the other end. 

7. To garage sale or not to garage sale, that is the question! If you have items that are probably not going to fit in your new residence, why pay a mover to do the heavy lifting when you are most likely going to let go of the overflow of furniture? A moving sale is win-win. 

8. If you have friends and family who will drop everything to help you, then get on your knees and give thanks! And, don't forget to feed these angels well.

9. Hire movers for the heavy furniture and boxes of books. 

10. Pace yourself or have your chiropractor on speed dial. 

   Set up a work space as soon as possible so that bills and paperwork don't overwhelm you.

   Set up a work space as soon as possible so that bills and paperwork don't overwhelm you.

11. Set up one bathroom and the essentials in the kitchen as soon as possible. You can't go wrong with a stash of chocolate, almonds, and iced cold Lacroix. 

12. Have lots of cleaning supplies on hand.

              Have a few of your favorite things in sight as you are moving in and unpacking.

              Have a few of your favorite things in sight as you are moving in and unpacking.

13. Have I mentioned pets? This is where it gets tricky. I have two cats and a dog. They knew change was brewing and reacted with predictable behaviors. Having a place for pets to feel safe during the transition is paramount to everyone's happiness. Bring blankets and bedding that smell familiar to them.  

14. Enjoy the process of moving in. It may feel good to "get it done," but some decisions need to simmer awhile and that's okay. 

I have unpacked many boxes, cleaned every inch of my new home, helped my daughter paint her room, wallpapered my bedroom for whimsy, planted a little kitchen patio garden, and have clocked many, many, many steps along the way to settling in. 

My pets have adjusted, I have found a beautiful path to walk my dog, and I just saw my first hummingbird. If you know me, you know this is a good omen!

My garage still holds many treasures and a growing donation pile. I brought more than I needed, but I do not regret it. I have found resourceful ways to repurpose some of my favorite things. The rest will be sorted one box at a time.

Moving to a new home is a change that I can live with and that I am embracing whole-heartedly. It is just what I need.

Closets...when it comes to getting dressed, less is more

Is your closet bulging with clothes that you no longer wear, clothes that you might wear given a different life, clothes that no longer fit, clothes that have seen better days, clothes that have lost their appeal or just bring a frown to your face? 

If you answered, "Yes," then I understand because I have been where you stand...just outside the closet door, dreading it even though it holds an abundance of beautiful things. Why? Because they are crowded by the other "stuff,"  the stuff that needs a new and grateful home. 

Spring is just around the corner and wouldn't it be nice to open the door to your closet and love what you see? How much time would you save having just what you need to get dressed quickly and in a style that suits you? Wouldn't it be refreshing to have room in your closet for that something new that makes your heart sing?! 

If you have been following me on Facebook, then you know I have been exploring  closet organization strategies. My reason for doing this was two-fold.

First of all, a personal closet review was long overdue. Second of all, several people have asked my thoughts regarding Marie Kondo's Konmari Method.

So, I began there, utilizing "The Magic Art of Tidying Up," by Marie Kondo. How convenient that she asks that you begin your "tidying up" journey by sorting and purging your clothing. 

I admit that I was tentative at first which only served to slow down the entire process. But, once I embraced her "pull-it-all-out-and-only-keep-what-sparks-joy" methodology, it worked. I honestly love everything in my closet, well almost everything. There are still a few pieces that I am holding in reserve.

That said, less is definitely better! But what to do with it all?!

My mother will tell you that she loves my style. But, she has to say that though 'cuz she's my mom. I LOVE styling others. As for myself,  I struggle a little bit unless I adhere to my must-have trifecta: Cut, Color, and Comfort.

Enter my second closet strategy: reading and studying the content in "The Curated Closet," by Anuschka Rees.  Such a useful book filled with beautiful visuals and practical ideas regarding building a wardrobe that reflects what you need for the life that you lead. 

closet organization

I spent an entire weekend reviewing my pared down closet, studying colors and shapes and patterns, thinking about where and how I spend my time, and remembering what I love about clothing. I know, I can hear you laughing or scolding now, wondering how you are going to find an entire weekend to devote to your clothing and closet overhaul. Sadly, or as luck would have it, I had a nasty virus and needed something to keep my cabin fever at bay.

As they say, when the student is ready, the teacher will come. I was a captive audience. 

So here is my take away from my weekend of closet review, reflection, and revision:

1. There is no shame in having nice things in your closet. After all, we cannot run around naked. Feeling good in your clothing allows you to get on with your day in a confident manner.

2. Less IS more. It takes less time to put outfits together when everything you own suits your style and your life. 

3. Play with outfitting and take notes and photos for later. Really! 

4. Keep a few go-to outfits ready for those times that you are rushing or are over-scheduled (who me?!). You will thank yourself later, trust me!

5. Sharing feels good. Let go of the garments that you no longer wear, need, or love while someone else can still benefit from them.

6. My three personal criteria for clothing must be met or I am throwing money away. If a garment is not comfortable, not a good cut for my body,  or not a color that I feel confident wearing, then I say, "No!" 

7. I am clear on what I like and on what I need , but am in no hurry to add to my wardrobe unless I LOVE it.

8. I have a good foundational, neutral wardrobe. Adding pops of color is where I will focus my efforts next! I see shades of red, raspberry, and greens in my future.

9. Strategic placement of my garments has streamlined the time it takes to choose an outfit. As I returned garments to my closet, I considered how and where I would be wearing them. Work clothes are together, clothing for outings are separate from what I wear when I do heavy organizing jobs. You get the idea.

10. Time spent planning and organizing saves you time in the long run!  

My advice to you as I close this chapter is this: Take time to review, reflect, and revise what you already have in your closet before adding anything new. Be honest with yourself and let go of what is just getting in your way. You may find that you already have what you need. If not, you will definitely have a clearer picture of what is missing to make getting dressed easier.

Cheers to finding less stress and more joy in your closet. 

Much love,




Plan B...How to ride the ebb and flow of life

Riding the ebb and flow of life requires that we let go of unrealistic expectations and perfectionism and embrace Plan B.

I did not have the perfect, happy new year that I eagerly anticipated. In the past 10 days, I have lost a dear brother-in-law, and had a thug come to my home and threaten harm to me and my family. Yes, this really happened! How dare he intrude upon my grief and threaten my nest.

Not much that the police can do until the thug is more specific with his threats. I know his name, but not exactly when or how he plans to hurt me. I guess even criminals need to show SMART goals to be taken seriously by the police. 

That would be enough to send anyone into a tail spin. But to add insult to injury, I have experienced technical challenges with a brand new computer, and the wi-fi connection in my home which made simple things that I take for granted, more difficult.

And, it all happened in the space of a few days.

This challenging first week of 2017 has been a good reminder to appreciate what is working in my life, to count my many blessings, to remember my priorities, and to dig deeply to find joy. 

Enter Plan B and letting good enough be good enough which is better than constantly judging and worrying. Right?!

If you set one intention for the new year, let it be permission to enjoy good enough. I promise there is more joy in good enough than in chasing elusive perfectionism.

You may find, as I have, that there is enough of you to go around to meet the deadlines that are truly most important to you, to spend time with those you hold dearest, and to keep and have what is really most needed and useful to you. 

It also leaves cushion in your days for the unexpected. Life is messy and there will be curves ahead, no matter how carefully you plan and strategize. Travel is cancelled due to weather, computers crash, clients cancel due to illness, budgets change with health challenges.  

I have learned that when I am not solely dependent upon a specific outcome to the detriment of all else, I channel the arts of resilience and resourcefulness allowing the creative side of my brain to shine.

Kaleidoscope Inn, Nipomo California

Kaleidoscope Inn, Nipomo California

I feel more joyful when perfectionism is not a driving force in my life and I tend to savor my time and efforts by allowing myself to become more fully present in whatever I am doing. It doesn't mean that I don't strive for excellence. I do. Nor does it mean that I don't feel irritable or impatient when Plan A goes awry. I just don't let these glitches completely ruin my day, at least not for long. This week has certainly tested my peace of mind and resilience.  

Let me be clear, I am not suggesting that you throw out your planners or lose sight of your goals. Planning is a must. We all know the benefits of writing our goals, scheduling appointments, making lists, breaking projects into tasks and then doing one piece at a time. 

I am just suggesting that when the unexpected curve-balls of life hurdle straight at your head, set down your carefully detailed plan, focus upon your breathing and do one thing that is within your control. And when you finish that, repeat. 

This is what I have done the past few days, and it has made all the difference. I am still grieving and will spend as much time with family as I can. I have made my family and home as safe as possible. I have worked with tech support to fix my computer. And along the way, I have remembered what is important to me, have let others lend a hand, and have prayed more than I have in a long time. I still retain my sense of humor and have taken a little time out for myself, despite feeling the walls close around me.

Plan B is working just fine.